If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Randomize
