Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
