based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize
