she looked like the bat from fern gully.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Randomize
