You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Randomize
