Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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