we have pet lesbian snakes
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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