She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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