It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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