does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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