We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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