I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
