Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
