Soap is not a condiment
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
