I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
