Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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