If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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