the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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