I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
