The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
