Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I got inside last night via doggy door
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
