her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Randomize
