we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
