Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
