haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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