Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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