spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
