I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
