But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
