i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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