i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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