Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Randomize
