The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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