I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Randomize
