I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
