Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
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