I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
