D3 body, D1 cock
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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