shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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