We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Randomize