Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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