haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
