you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
