i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Where did you get a picture of my penis
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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