My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
