haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize