laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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