are you still at the devil's house?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
please come you make the beer taste better
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Randomize
