Christians are straight up FREAKS
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
