We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
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