sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
