OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
